Bestiality

I'm walking home from downtown about midnight on Thursday with my dog, and a big truck drives past with some kid hanging his head out the window, presumably because he's about to throw up.

He spots my dog and begins verbally and affectionately coddling him.

"Oh Craig, Hi Craig! Aren't you cute Craig... Yes, good boy Craig pee on that fire hydrant Craig. I love you Craig."

My dog's name is not Craig, nor am I acquainted with this crack head for the record.

The driver reaches the end of the block, and we are no longer in his sights, but I can only suppose the vision of "Craig's beauty" lingers in his memory.

"Craig!! Craig!! I'm so drunk Craig! Help me Craig! I love you Craig!"

He passes another block, but fearing Craig may not be able to hear him, his voice escalates as his distance increases.

"Craig!! Craig, find me! I will (perform sexual acts on you) Craig!"

It was a poignant scene.